Daily Quote: "It's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years." ~Abraham Lincoln
Only two more weeks of radiation therapy!! My last scheduled radiation day is on Friday, August 5th, but will see my oncologist, Dr. Parks on August 23rd to setup a PET Scan as to see if my cancer is in remission. I see the light at the end of the tunnel. I continued my walking/running last week, but at a reduced amount as to allow my body to heal from the cancer treatments, and still feel that I'm easing into my return to running.
I've gained three pounds since last week and currently weigh 166 pounds (my lowest weight was 159 on June 30th); I hope to return to my racing weight of 170 pounds during August.
I have no pain at this time, which is a relief in itself, but do feel tremendous fatigue and had deep depression during last weekend. In the past when I felt depression my running habit had helped relieve my symptoms, but now since I've been off depression medications for many years and don't run during the weekends, my depression does return with a vengenance. I just have to tough it out for two more weeks and keep a stiff upper lip.
I'm still sleeping over ten hours a day and with naps too. I often feel that when I'm awake my head is in a thick fog and can't think quickly. My short term memory is horrible lately. I don't feel that I'm fully living, only existing day by day. I've lost all desire to do anything except sleeping. The year 2011 is a lost year with my mind lost in a blur. I must wrap my thoughts with the realization that my cancer situation is temporary and it's almost over.
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5 comments:
Only 2 weeks to go...you can do this Bruce!!! Almost over and yes, a light at the end of the tunnel. I am so sorry to hear that you are having a tough time. I think of you often and can't wait to read your update when the radiation is done. You can do this!!!
Wow! Only 2 weeks left, so close!!! So sorry you are dealing with depression, I know how that feels. If you don't get past it soon, do seek some help, there is no reason to suffer extra with something that can be fixed even if just for the short term. *HUGS*
there are lots of positives in your blog today, Bruce .... no pain, only two weeks of therapy left, a 3 lb weight gain, you continuing your easing back into running... all fantastic!!!
Try to focus on these huge accomplishments when you find yourself sinking into depression. You have coped with so much ... and come through so much..... while working the whole time...!!! You are AMAZING!!!! Instead of feeling depressed you should be filled with pride in yourself!
I personally am FILLED with admiration for you... and know that you can totally do this!! :-)
#a big group hug....(((Wendy Sarah Bruce Lizzie)))# :-)
I have a feeling that its easy to get lost in all that is going on, but at the same point you are right ... there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Keep the light (not the darkness) in your view and move forward. You'll get there, one step at a time ;)
+ infinity to all the positives comments by previous bloggers.
Bruce, rather than think of 2011 a lost year, think of it as a new beginning! You've gone through some horrendous trials, and those trials are a time of growth for you. Now, your challenge is to decide how the lessons you've learned in the past months can help you in future months.
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